Binge Eating: Bake cookies without the freakout

binge eating cookies

Do you love to bake cookies, but are afraid that you will begin binge eating?

There’s is an underlying fear that once you start eating, you won’t be able to stop.

Binge eating is very common with sugary foods. We label them as ‘bad’ (but eat them anyways).

Sugar is also addictive in nature, and connects us to memories from our childhood. For me, it’s homemade chocolate chip cookies. I remember in high school eating two cookies for breakfast and two more after lunch. At the time I didn’t consider this a binge because I never felt guilty or hated myself for it. It wasn’t until college when I would come home over break and have the urge to eat every cookie in site. I knew I would feel terrible after doing so, but I didn’t care. This was my way of managing my tough emotions and finding comfort. 

It used to be such a debate (in my head) as to whether I should bake cookies or not. I love baking, but when it started to cost me my happiness and sanity because of binge eating I stopped baking all together. I took this ‘break from baking’ to figure out the underlying issues about why I was binge eating.

So here is how you can bake cookies without the freakout of binge eating.

  1. Allow yourself, fully, to have the cookie – You have to allow yourself to have the cookie. If you have binged after baking before, ask yourself if you were really allowing yourself to eat. Or if you were eating and subconsciously telling yourself that you shouldn’t be eating. Get excited that you are about to eat one of the most pleasurable foods ever!

When you don’t allow yourself to eat what you want the “outer child” rebels. She throws a tantrum – which means you end up eating more than you would have. 

This seems most challenging with strict food rules. You try to follow a specific diet or program, and are on a mission to lose weight (or shape shift). Everyone is entitled to experiment with their way of eating in attempt to enhance their worldly experience. But emotional eating, binge eating, and compulsive eating require you to let go of all the rules, ride the wave, and feel into your emotions. The more strict you are around what foods you eat or how much to eat the more your binge eating will persist.

So for now, let go of being paleo, vegan, Whole 30, or whatever program it is that you’re trying to mold yourself into. There will be a time again that you can come back to this diet to experiment and see what happens. But right now your way of eating is causing you to binge eat, and leaving you emotionally drained and unhappy. Try tuning in, and fully allowing yourself to have the cookie.

Binge Eating cookies

        2. Bring all your senses – Did you know that binge eating is literally impossible when you are in a slow and relaxed state? Think back on all the times that you have binged… it was fast, furious, and out of control. Most of us have five senses (taste, smell, sight, touch, and hearing), but we don’t always use these to our highest ability when we sit down to eat.

I have clients say, ‘I don’t even know how my food tastes because I eat so fast.’

So savor the eating experience. Bring gratitude back into your routine and bless the food with your time and presence. Take some deep breaths for the aroma to wash over you. The smell will switch the Enteric Nervous System, or your ‘brain belly’ ON. You will begin to feel physically hungry (stomach growling, mouth watering). Chew slowly, mindfully. Feel the food work down the throat and into the belly. Hear your inner voice speak to you. I am full now. I feel good now. I am okay and nourished and ready to move on with my day now.

Leave the table with the intention to feel good.

3. Positive Cookie Psychology – Yes, I’m aware this is a very technical term.  But really, imagine that eating a cookie is a life enhancing moment. A place in time where you are doing exactly what you want to be doing. The chocolate chips, the crisp, the soft, the ooey gooey, the pleasure of eating with no guilt or shame. Positive Cookie Psychology states, “I am not a bad person for eating this.”

binge eating

And all in the same breath, if you really don’t want to eat the cookie, don’t. We could get into a whole new topic about friends pressuring friends to eat what they do so they don’t feel bad about what they are choosing. But hey, in the end, it’s always your choice. It’s beautiful that we get to decide what we want to eat on an everyday basis. It’s not like that everywhere. Be grateful.

So what if you were able to bake cookies at home and not binge eat on them? You were relaxed, and turned on by the entire experience of eating a delicious blob of awesomeness. And your Positive Cookie Psychology says, ‘I’m a badass and can eat whatever I choose at any given moment.’

For me, that feels like freedom.

Light & Love,

Macy

 

Criticism: why it doesn’t work & what to do instead

Criticism: why it doesn’t work & what to do instead

3 Simple Inquiries to shift criticism into acceptance 

Do you notice what happens when we (society) allow criticism into our lives?

  • Negative thoughts (about them, the others, and you) swirl around in your head.
  • Someone (somewhere) is being rejected, not allowed, or boycotted.
  • Stories are made up depending on how the situation was perceived.
  • And what results is suffering, anxiety, sadness, anger, resentment, and hatred.

Is this the experience that you want to have? Do you want to feel those feelings or are you stuck in the pattern of criticism?

Now I want you to see what happens when we bring acceptance into our lives…

  • Positive thoughts (about them, the other, and you), aspiration, inspiration, and creativity live abundantly in your head space.
  • Someone (somewhere) loves you, cares about you and your highest values.
  • Stories are being created in the moment, and shared with others to spread joy.
  • And what results is love, gratitude, relaxation, happiness, and freedom.

So here is what you can do to rewire our reaction towards acceptance instead of criticism.

acceptance

1. Speak from the heart, not from the head. Remember when your mom used to say, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all”? I’m considering the same concept, but worded as, “Tell the truth, but always (always) stem from a place of love.”

NOONE IS GOING TO TAKE, GROW, EXPAND, EVOLVE FROM YOUR CRITICISM IF YOU ARE COMING FROM A PLACE OF JUDGEMENT, RIDICULE, OR LACK.

On the flip side,

EVERYONE IS GOING TO TAKE, GROW, EXPAND, EVOLVE FROM YOUR CITICISM IF YOU ARE COMING FROM A PLACE OF LOVE, CARING, COMMITMENT, AND TRANSFORMATION.

For example,

A mother notices (duh they freaking notice everything) that her 20 year old daughter is struggling with weight and body image. She tells her daughter to go on this particular diet because she needs to lose weight, and that she will help her keep track of weekly weigh-ins, measure her BMI, measure food portions, and scold her if she misses a workout.

(Note a few keywords: diet, track, measure, scold, and miss.)

Another mother notices that her 20 year old daughter is struggling with her weight and body image. She talks to her daughter about life in general to see if she notices any self-sabotage. She asks, “you’re not acting like yourself, what’s going on? Are you struggling with anything in particular right now? I’m here for you and have probably gone through something similar in my life. Lets talk.”

The first mother is not accepting who her daughter is in this moment and all her actions are an attempt for her daughter to change. The second mother is full of acceptance and compassion for the struggles that her daughter is going through.

criticism

2. Reflect on your judgements of others and turn it around onto yourself. What we perceive as flaws or criticize others for is the exact thing that we see as our own flaws.

Oh my, look at the girl’s ass, it is huge!

Well…. what do you think of your own ass?

Whenever you catch yourself being the mean girl, turn that thought or statement around to yourself and see what comes up for you. Nuff said.

3. Acceptance of what is will give you freedom in the present moment. We have to accept reality, what is true. Even if it’s not where we want to be, it’s where we are supposed to be. The more we can honor that place the less self-imposed suffering we will have. Byron Katie is the queen of this idea, and for that I’m going to leave you with a few of her quotes.

“I am a lover of what is, not because I’m a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality.”
― Byron KatieLoving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life

“Placing the blame or judgment on someone else leaves you powerless to change your experience; taking responsibility for your beliefs and judgments gives you the power to change them”
― Byron Katie

“Our parents, our children, our spouses, and our friends will continue to press every button we have, until we realize what it is that we don’t want to know about ourselves, yet. They will point us to our freedom every time.”
― Byron KatieLoving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life

criticism

So what if you are able to shift away from criticism and towards acceptance every time you notice that you are judging yourself or someone else? When you give criticism it is actually more like feedback, coming from the heart instead of the head. And whatever advice you give someone else, you reflect that same statement onto yourself in order to enhance your experience and evolution. Then, in the end, you were full of acceptance. Accepting what is, and at the same time creating your own reality through inquiry of thoughts.